Happy end of old year

This has been an odd year, despite 2020 being an even number. Nevertheless, this post is not about pandemics or political tomfoolery, but a message from Ping – to you – about the power of music, humour and … But lets not get ahead of ourselves. This year saw the release of the much anticipated “The Zigzag Manoeuvre” on Apollon Records Prog. We are delighted to finally share our work with you again, after the long period of radio silence. Some of you might have heard that one of the songs on the album – “Hammer falling from the sky” – was written and partly recorded two days before our studio burnt to the ground. Thankfully, the recording was saved! And it just so turns out that this song contains several premonitions of the year that just passed by “Like a hammer falling from the sky – on your head – on your toe – again”.

With the arrival of a new year, here’s from the heart of our bottoms – from Ping with love:

Hammer falling from the sky

Like a carrot on the market, 
or a stain on the carpet.  
Like a shave at the barber shop,  
I will be there for you.  

A parking ticket on your windshield,  
a hammer falling from the sky. 
On your head. On your toe. Again.  

Like a crumble in the jungle, 
Scissors when you stumble.
Withered flowers on the grave, 
I will be there for you.
He will be there for you.  

Like a piece of salmon sandwich, 
or pepperoni with cheese, 
or chickpeas if you please. 

I’m running in your tights, 
Feel the cold, dark light.
Shattered, feel like shite! 
Mom! This doesn’t feel right! 

A parking ticket on your windshield,
A hammer falling from the sky. 

Milk your mom – new single

Milk your mom is a passionate epos about at least three dwarves, Tipsy, Weepy and Jingly, maybe more. It is also a blatant mockery of a “Weepy, wobbly wimp who wants a wall”, which would have been funny, if it weren’t so sad. It is a beautiful audiolisation of the half baked truths of contemporary society, that might do some good. Consequently, it is also the ugly bastard of fake news and ill will. Milk your mom, dude.

Spotify

Painting by Christer Karlstad. Design by Martin Kvamme.

Milk your mom

Sleepy, sloppy slips of sense and soul.
Heaps of hoppy hippies down a hole.
Creepy, croppy crips come crawling home.
Sleepy, sloppy slips of sense and soul.

What are you gonna do?
When you wake up?

Tipsy, topsy trips of mind control.
Weepy, wobbly wimp who wants a wall.
Jingly, jangly bling that jinx the parole.
Mingy, mangy mingers milk your mom!

Tipsy stay here, Weepy don’t go,
Jingly, my love, I need you near.

Biggly, boldly, braggly, breaks the role.
Quingy, quirky, craving for a crown.
Break my bone.
Biggly, boldly, braggly, breaks the role.

God made my Day – New single out now!

Fret no more – the long wait is officially over, as Ping reemerge with a brand new rocker from the upcoming album “The Zigzag Manoeuvre”. “God Made My Day” is a hard rocking vision of post-apocalyptic Russia, sparked with enthusiasm and Jamiroquaiesque chorus. Once again, impressive cover art by painter Christer Karlstad and designer Martin Kvamme. All instruments are played by the usual suspects, including the sensational Kristoffer Berre Alberts breathing air rhythmically through his portable single-reed brass artifact.

Spotify

Youtube

Painting by Christer Karlstad. Design by Martin Kvamme.

God Made My Day

Climbing out of the shelter.
Through the rubble of the Voronezh Zoo.
With a zig-zag Manoeuvre, on a prowl tonight.

God made my day! Climbing out,
through the rumble of the Voronezh zoo
With a zig-zag manoeuvre, on a prowl tonight.

Don’t ask why. It’s the day I die.
It’s a broken voice. It’s a living lie

On a motorcycle trip, going straight to the top,
two bucks for a bang and a holler!
Bang! Bang! Bang!

Don’t ask why, it’s the day we die,
it’s a broken marble, we’re flying high.

I’m waiting for the water to boil.

Climbing back in the shelter.

…out of the ashes

As many of you know 2014 was a rough year for Ping. Our studio for thirteen years burnt down, combusting most of our equipment and instruments. Amazingly – one harddisk with our recorded material survived! Still, it has taken time, money and effort to find a new place and rebuild everything. We are currently in a good groove and looking forward to share new material with you, as well as play some gigs!

The A-side

Also known as Radio Hit #1, here’s the lyrics to The A-side. Feel free to sing along.

Is there poison in my wine?

I’m a leopard out of line.

Dining with your pretty friends,

I represent the odds and ends

of this night.

 

You told me what I cannot do,

All the wrongs I resist for you.

Laughing with your best of friends,

Morning comes and I’ll make amends,

but not tonight.

 

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Falls like a star with a number for name.

 

So I spill my semen and heart

So sincere, this vulgar art.

Mingling with the spotlight fiends

Wonder if it ever ends,

but it might.

 

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Falls like a star with a number for name.

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Shining the surface, striving for fame.

Artwork for the new single ready!

Ping is proud to present the artwork for our coming single “The A-side/The B-side”. Visual miracle worker, Mr Martin Kvamme, once again steps up and does his magic.

The A-side

 

The single will be available on 7″ vinyl and digital download, courtesy of Brown Lagoon Records. The grand release will be at John Dee, Oslo, Saturday May 11th. Get your tickets here!

 

The B-side

Motorik

Ping is proud to present this visually stunning video from “The Hurricane Spoof”.
While enjoying the pulsating beat of Motorik, director Erik Ferguson realised he ought to gather the Bergen mob; get down and dirty, not to mention semi-nude, to deliver this gritty piece of noir document. I’m telling you, this is almost exactly as it happened in that particular reality.

Sitting in metal, looking at plants
Living in concrete, looking through glass
Putting plants in my mouth
Pointing arm to the south
It’s so easy, it’s so easy

Shaking body laying on the rocks
Receiving sound in the ear
Twisting mouth while making these words
Processing sound that I hear

Oh, I’m gonna keep it easy,
Can you switch the light?
’cause I’m living in it,
tell me when to stop
’cause the sky has turned white

Surfin’ Microwaves

Ah…

      Surfin' Microwaves
. As the title suggests we’re dealing with epic material here. You see, for Ping, surfing is not a mere recreational activity or a diverter of pastime; it’s a mode of transport. So let’s all join virtual hands and smack the lip together as we traverse unexplored musical and philosophical landscapes. Hang loose!

Out surfing on the microwaves
Face to face with an empty space
Lay like dust on a grave during earthquake
Hand in hand with the unplanned

Dive, dive, dive, dive..
Surf or dive!

Way too small to magnify, put it on the weight
it’s about to qualify
Measuring the value,
there is time to decimate

Surf’s up and the market’s down
No. 3 is your number one clown!
Too alive call the liquidator
When in doubt check the online translator

Donate an organ to electrify,
we need a brain
Brand new prototype
Putting your axe to the max
Get ready to decapitate

We need a brain!

Surfin’ Microwaves features trumpet & viola arrangements by Roald Madland, performed by Kim Alexander Wiegels Eriksen & Bendik Bjørnstad Foss, while Georg Lundgren is hammering the bongos.

Ave Pingus – new single & video

At long last, Brown Lagoon Media Syndicate is proud to present the première piece of pingoleeze prog-pop from “The Hurricane Spoof“.

Ave Pingus follows the tale of a troubled romantic and his talented, juvenile monkey.

I put leather beneath my soles to insulate
a lever between our souls to isolate
I let her behold my sole emotion – hate
wrote a letter before it’s too late

I got a present for you – lost in the woods
It’s a little baby monkey, making a scene
He’s got a heart of gold and your name tattooed on his tongue
every night he puts up a show; playing your emotions

Ave Pingus

I’ve got a pheasant for you – lost in the woods
I’ve got a headache for you, know what I mean?
oh…

We got it under control – the monkey’s got it under control!

State of the civilization – February 2011

We are happy to announce that Ping is pregnant with a new record! Temporarily titled “The Gazebo of Malevolence”, we suspect it will be a chart breaker that will dispel any financial worry, both for the band and the listener!

Hmm, did I not read this very sentence less than a year ago, the avid reader of thepingpage.com is telling himself while reading this post. Indeed you did dear reader! The humble writer merely cut’n’pasted the paragraph so that you could pride yourself with having a decent capability for memory, as well as an excellent taste in music.

That said, the introduction is no less true today; Ping is still pregnant with a record. Imagine The body of Ping, filled to the brim with organic and inorganic sounds, creative forces both malevolent and benign, just waiting to burst on the scene in a sonic psychedelic parturition hitherto unheard of.

How long is a musical gestation period, you might enquire? A valid question that is seldom posed, the answer to which might possibly be calculated through the use of advanced algorithms and non-scientific statistics. I probably need not remind you that the average gestation period for a mouse is 20 days, baboon 187 days, human 259-294 days and elephant 600-660 days!

Heeding this, we may conclude that the coming album will not resemble any mouse or ape. It will definitely be trans-human, and (bear with me) it might very well be elephantastic…

Stay tuned and sing along – maybe in May, we’ll be gay on the bay!

Bad News | Good News | Ave Pingus

Fellow spacemen – due to incongruency in the flux capacitor the Ping news feed has been dormant for a while. Now, equilibrium restored, the saga continues with Janus-faced tidings.

Long time donor of organ sounds Norm Fredheim Hanson has abdicated from stardom, in support of his wife’s dairy productions. A striking blow to the band’s keyboard section, as well as an increase in average body mass index of the troupe. Fortunately Norm Hanson has promised to reappear suddenly and infrequently, both in studio and on stage.
What could have become a hole in the band’s wall of sonus however, seemed like a most fitting position for none other than Norm’s best man – Thomas Haugbro, Esq. Axe grinder Thomas, Esq. has already joined forces with Ping on stage several times during the past couple of years so his inclusion was a natural development in the Ping saga. We are most pleased to have Thomas, Esq. on board and we’re confident that his affection for 70’s guitar grooves will bring a new dimension to this musical complexion.

Thomas Haugbro, Esq.
Thomas Haugbro, Esq.

We are also happy to announce that Ping is pregnant with a new record! Temporarily titled “The Gazebo of Malevolence”, we suspect it will be a chart breaker that will dispel any financial worry, both for the band and the listener! Now, doesn’t that sound like a deal? Popular hits include “I put a smell on you”, “Leave your lame and your lumber” and “Ave Pingus – the monkey goes bananas”. Stay tuned and we might just give you an audible low down.

Ping hyller Tom Waits på Rockefeller

Mandag 7. desember runder vår alles Tom Waits 60 år. I den anledning trommer et kobbel norske og svenske artister sammen til storslagen feiring på Rockefeller. Som kjent er Jørgen i barselperm til nyttår, men for en kvelds skyld lar han barn være barn og tar whiskeyrøsten med på scenen igjen. Vi gleder oss!

!n181722261182_2223

Release Party – August 1st 2009

Welcome all to a friendly gathering in celebration of our fourth release – Discotheque of Darkness.

The shit will hit the fans at Café Mono, Oslo, Saturday August 1st, and we’ll start playing in prime time, exactly corresponding with barne-tv at NRK, that is 18.00.

So bring your distant relatives, your secret lovers and your local state leaders; this is musical bonanza at the utterly unfair price of gratis/no-charge-what-so-ever.

The dough you save on the entrance fee may, if you wish, be spent on the purchasing of the tonal goods, be it in handy compact disc format, or retro vinyl style.

See you!

Hippopop

      Hippopop
is a little chart breaker that got cut from “Discotheque of Darkness” at the final hour. This was actually the first song we recorded after “The Castle Massacre” so the ‘steady’ backbeat comes with compliments to Αλέξανδρος Lindusbächus. The Nord Lead II synthesizer made its debut here, as well as Ping’s own manufactured plug-in: The Beavis and Buttheadizer. No non-alcoholic beverages were consumed during the making of this song.

Shave your head and find the spot,

Put a flower in the pot.

Snap to bar and have a drink,

Crack the star and let it sink,

It makes me think – I have found the missing link!

Platypussy, Platypussy Go, Go – Platypussy Go!

Levitate & Deviate.

Hippo pop

Discotheque of Darkness – to be released August 1st.

(For english – press f9, then scroll down. Otherwise, scroll away)

Vær hilset! Det har vært en liten taushetsperiode fra Ping nå. Tiden har vi benyttet til å finslipe «Discotheque of Darkness» som skal utgis på Luftwaffel Records 1. august.

Albumet blir tilgjengelig på gatefold vinyl og CD, samt gjennom alle store nettbutikker.

Vi vil fortsatt legge ut gamle og nye perler på thepingpage.com, om enn ikke i en månedlig syklus. Men, stikk jevnlig innom for enkle rariteter, og storslåtte epos.

Hva kan vi så si om skiva?

Som vanlig er det essensen av en rekke svisker, oppkledd i ny plommedrakt. Avantgardistisk gladpomp på popmanér. Sfærisk vellyd tilpasset menneskeøret óg dyreøret. Kort og godt – gjødsel for din åndelige vekst!

Relevante inspirasjonskilder er Steely Dan, Syd Barret, Motörhead og Vidar Sandbeck. Og som vanlig – de fire store B’ene: The Beatles, Beach Boys, Beefheart og Bobbysocks.

I anledning utgivelsen blir det en gratis slippekonsert på Café Mono i Oslo, lørdag 1. august. Mer informasjon om dette kommer senere, men datoen kan du sette av allerede. Grunnet familieøkning vil det nemlig bli et svært begrenset antall muligheter til å oppleve Ping live i år!

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If you pressed f9: Congrats – you have just reserved one copy of Ping’s fourth release “Discotheque of Darkness”, which is to be released on Luftwaffel Records. You can pick it up at the release show Saturday August 1st at Café Mono in Oslo or at your nearest cybershop. The album will be available on gatefold vinyl and CD, as well as through all major digital distributors.

The music may be described as manure for your spiritual growth.

Brothers

What we have here is a stupid song; stupid, stupid, stupid. Still,

      Brothers
was our first single to reach top ten on the charts of Uqbar in Tlön. Banging the drum on this tune is ole Maestro Lindbäck. The trombone section is conducted by Wankin’ Fredheim. The entire Ping boys choir can be heard on the chorus, and we are looking for a music corps to help us perform the finale live!

One day I was so stupid, one day I was so stupid,

so really really stupid, you can’t believe how stupid!

I wouldn’t put a bet on how stupid I can get,

my maiden name is Stupid – stupid, stupid, stupid.

Today when I discovered the matrix of all things,

geometry of poetry, and the missing lynx.

Stupid’s gonna be on the news today, yeah!

Now they gonna listen to what stupid’s gotta say!

I met my brother at the end of a mile,

hadn’t seen him for quite a while,

he told me stories ’bout his fishing gear,

I told him ’bout my deepest fear.

I met my brother at the end of the Nile,

we hadn’t met for quite a while

I told him ’bout my old guitar,

he promised me a ride in his car.


Konstantinopel – Live@John Dee 17/01/09

Byzantium, Miklagard, Tsargrad, Istanbul, Stamboul – these are all names for the same city in Turkey – Constantinople, or Konstantinopel in Norwegian. Free of charge thepingpage.com provides you with this trivium to impress your friends, nemesis, teachers and/or mistresses.

Not suprisingly and not unrelated, Konstantinopel is also the title of

      this
humalong tune, as performed on stage in Oslo, at John Dee 17/01/09.

Rumour has it that a Turkish fraction is contemplating to make Konstantinopel the new Turkish national anthem! (But these are rumours, as I said, and it’s probably more like a fraction of a fraction…)

Ping on iTunes!

It’s only been three years and a couple of weeks since the release of The Castle Massacre. To exploit all the hype and media surrounding this recent release we decided to make the album available through iTunes!

We are confident that the enormous amount of income this will generate, will help us during the finalization of our coming album “Discotheque of Darkness” which is scheduled this summer on Luftwaffel Records. (These are not mere speculations, but official rumours damn it!)