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The A-side

Also known as Radio Hit #1, here’s the lyrics to The A-side. Feel free to sing along.

Is there poison in my wine?

I’m a leopard out of line.

Dining with your pretty friends,

I represent the odds and ends

of this night.

 

You told me what I cannot do,

All the wrongs I resist for you.

Laughing with your best of friends,

Morning comes and I’ll make amends,

but not tonight.

 

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Falls like a star with a number for name.

 

So I spill my semen and heart

So sincere, this vulgar art.

Mingling with the spotlight fiends

Wonder if it ever ends,

but it might.

 

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Falls like a star with a number for name.

Feels like I’m fishing in bottles of water,

Shining the surface, striving for fame.

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Surfin’ Microwaves

Ah…

      Surfin' Microwaves
. As the title suggests we’re dealing with epic material here. You see, for Ping, surfing is not a mere recreational activity or a diverter of pastime; it’s a mode of transport. So let’s all join virtual hands and smack the lip together as we traverse unexplored musical and philosophical landscapes. Hang loose!

Out surfing on the microwaves
Face to face with an empty space
Lay like dust on a grave during earthquake
Hand in hand with the unplanned

Dive, dive, dive, dive..
Surf or dive!

Way too small to magnify, put it on the weight
it’s about to qualify
Measuring the value,
there is time to decimate

Surf’s up and the market’s down
No. 3 is your number one clown!
Too alive call the liquidator
When in doubt check the online translator

Donate an organ to electrify,
we need a brain
Brand new prototype
Putting your axe to the max
Get ready to decapitate

We need a brain!

Surfin’ Microwaves features trumpet & viola arrangements by Roald Madland, performed by Kim Alexander Wiegels Eriksen & Bendik Bjørnstad Foss, while Georg Lundgren is hammering the bongos.

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Ping live tracks added

Live tracks from a concert at Gamla, Oslo 2010. Check them out at Ping For Your Pod, to the right. Thanks to Kristoffer Alberts (Saxophone), Kim Alexander Wiegels Eriksen (Trumpet) and ex-Ping Hans Norman Fredheim (Keys).

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Hippopop

      Hippopop
is a little chart breaker that got cut from “Discotheque of Darkness” at the final hour. This was actually the first song we recorded after “The Castle Massacre” so the ‘steady’ backbeat comes with compliments to Αλέξανδρος Lindusbächus. The Nord Lead II synthesizer made its debut here, as well as Ping’s own manufactured plug-in: The Beavis and Buttheadizer. No non-alcoholic beverages were consumed during the making of this song.

Shave your head and find the spot,

Put a flower in the pot.

Snap to bar and have a drink,

Crack the star and let it sink,

It makes me think – I have found the missing link!

Platypussy, Platypussy Go, Go – Platypussy Go!

Levitate & Deviate.

Hippo pop

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Brothers

What we have here is a stupid song; stupid, stupid, stupid. Still,

      Brothers
was our first single to reach top ten on the charts of Uqbar in Tlön. Banging the drum on this tune is ole Maestro Lindbäck. The trombone section is conducted by Wankin’ Fredheim. The entire Ping boys choir can be heard on the chorus, and we are looking for a music corps to help us perform the finale live!

One day I was so stupid, one day I was so stupid,

so really really stupid, you can’t believe how stupid!

I wouldn’t put a bet on how stupid I can get,

my maiden name is Stupid – stupid, stupid, stupid.

Today when I discovered the matrix of all things,

geometry of poetry, and the missing lynx.

Stupid’s gonna be on the news today, yeah!

Now they gonna listen to what stupid’s gotta say!

I met my brother at the end of a mile,

hadn’t seen him for quite a while,

he told me stories ’bout his fishing gear,

I told him ’bout my deepest fear.

I met my brother at the end of the Nile,

we hadn’t met for quite a while

I told him ’bout my old guitar,

he promised me a ride in his car.


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Konstantinopel – Live@John Dee 17/01/09

Byzantium, Miklagard, Tsargrad, Istanbul, Stamboul – these are all names for the same city in Turkey – Constantinople, or Konstantinopel in Norwegian. Free of charge thepingpage.com provides you with this trivium to impress your friends, nemesis, teachers and/or mistresses.

Not suprisingly and not unrelated, Konstantinopel is also the title of

      this
humalong tune, as performed on stage in Oslo, at John Dee 17/01/09.

Rumour has it that a Turkish fraction is contemplating to make Konstantinopel the new Turkish national anthem! (But these are rumours, as I said, and it’s probably more like a fraction of a fraction…)

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The Dog – Live at John Dee, January 17th 2009

Thank you all for showing up at John Dee – it was a loaded house with a lovely crowd. This track catches but a glimpse of the atmosphere, “taped” straight from the mixing board and all, but it’s a lot of fun anyway! Kudos to our friends Kim the trumpeteer, Kristoffer the saxophile and Thomas, guitar gospeler. More songs to come!

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Flesh With a Wish

As a token of appreciation of you, the receiver of cadeaux audibles, Ping humbly offers

      this
little symphonic piece of joy to put you in that merry state of christmas spiritus. This opus was spawned in Jørgens mind womb and recorded live in the Ping studio. The one hitting it parapapapam is Ping’s own Claes Terjesen. Lyric wise this is a tribute to monkey man Charles Darwin. Musically we honour Donald Glen Vliet and Vincent Damon Furnier to name but a few. Now, you go figure out how this all relates to old Satan Claus on the cross….
Merry x-mas!

Underneath the city is a basement,

Underneath the stairway is a key.

Crawl through the pipelines in the sewer,

Maybe at the end you’ll see the sea.

Rotting lovely, let the flowers feast upon your

Flesh, guided by a wish,

To be guided by something else;

One day we”ll have maggots with brains,

Ringing their little bells.

Rotting lovely, let the flowers feast upon your

Flesh guided by a wish

Slowly, slowly, they say that you slow me down.

Slowly, slowly, roots coming up from the ground.

They’re gonna call out your name,

We’re gonna call out your name,

Call out your name one last time.

Rotting lovely, let the flowers feast upon your flesh…

Rotting lovely, let the flowers feast upon your

Flesh guided by a wish.

Call out your name, we’re gonna call out your name

One last time

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Cross Country Skiing

First of all; apologies for the long wait. Frankly, we’ve been busy. To make it up, we promise to have more material out before christmas.

As you may gather from the title,

      Cross Country Skiing
is a season oriented tune, describing the pleasures and leisures of nordic winter. Notice the steady, rockin’ drumbeat – that’s the old Boss hitting it. Jørgen’s passionate vocals on the bridge were inspired by Peter Hammill, and the hasty synth run was yours truly pretending to be Roy Wood – the wizzard.

Cross country skiing in the morning sun,

all pretty boys having fun, fun, fun.

I used to look inside the mirror,

now the mirror looks at him.

Cross country skiing in the morning sun,

all pretty boys having fun, fun, fun.

I careth not from where thou cameth

bearing ski wax in thy hand,

sliding naked down the glacier,

it’s the laying of the land.

Cross country skiing in the morning sun,

all pretty boys having fun, fun, fun.

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The Customer & the Manufacturer

      The Customer & the Manufacturer
– epic title and a true story. The seagulls habitate outside our studio and the “swedish/english”-monologue is authentic… something. Decipher at your own risk. The guitar/flute moods are performed by Mattis Santana and Hans Norman Zamfir. …Yabbadabbadabbaday – Hey!

The shame fills my heart like a fart fills an elevator,

I blamed it on art from the start, now it’s sooner than later.

First I do green, then I add grey,

I spit on it twice and call it a day –

May day! It’s Pay day!


The aim is a part of the tart that is mystically flavoured,

Shine my funny little Ballantine.

I left all my troubles behind

my lovely little funky rhymes.


First I did green, then I turned grey,

I ripped out my heart and used it as clay,

Mayday – yabbadabbadabbaday – Hey!!

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Donkey Kong

This song started out with a bunch of chord changes, and we had basically no idea where we were going. But by virtue of inspired lyrics and zesty vocals we found the formula. Once again thanks to Kristofer Alberts on the saxophone. If you spot any clarinet that would be Mattis doing the blow job, while Hans jerks the trombone. By the way; modulation in the middle of the refrain does not make it easier to perform this piece.

Alas, Ping proudly presents (You are the one that they used to call)

      Donkey Kong
.

I’ve got an itch in the fruit, I’m talking pain in the mango.

We’ve got a flying banana, let’s do the tangerine tango.

Hand in hand we’ll do the coconut calypso.

Pineapple boogie, in the Big Apple pie.

One night it stayed out late, I have a hole underneath my bed.

Please excuse me, don’t confuse me, I can’t go on without you, and you…

…and you are the one that they used to call Donkey Kong.

Last night it had a dream, and it was clear then just when and how –

much undone please don’t conceive me now!

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Discotheque of Darkness

Originally

      Discotheque of Darkness
was recorded on 8-track back in the 90s. The demo can be heard
      here
. However, when Jørgen came up with the final riff and we performed this rocker live, we knew it was time for a revitalized studio recording. Thanks to Kristoffer Alberts for exquisite saxopohone treatment.

Can you feel the presence of the Prince of Darkness?

Beelzebub is calling. Calling for your flesh now.

Everybody’s waiting. Darkness is the essence.

Enter as a christian; exit with the demons.

So come on! I’ll see you down at the

Discotheque of Darkness

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A Day in the Soup

While making the music for Berner & Bella, Mattis came up with the melody that was to become

      A Day in the Soup.
Tore loved it, and promptly decided to make a Eurotrance version of it, confident that it’d be a monster hit! Fortunately a disk crashed before the tune was done, but
      a demo
was saved.

When Ping decided to have a go at the melody again the working title thus became “Monster Hit”. The lyrics started out somewhat serious, but quickly curious things happened, and we had a theme for the song.

It is fine by me. If that’s how you feel, that’s the way it should be.

You can cry, you can sing, you can hope for some thing to be.

I fell in the soup, who will rescue me?

Floating around with mushroom and fish – today I’m a part of the musical dish.

And as the soup gets cold, you know that you are growing old.

And when the giant’s done, it’s time to take your hat and run.

The sparrow has fallen, the plate has been cleaned,

in the eyes of a dead girl the void can be seen – it’s fine by me.

Sleep now, rest your soul, the filthy rabbit has just left the hole.

Do you know you’re part of the dish?

If that’s the way it should be, waiter bring me one more melody.

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Hick in the Mall

      Hick in the Mall
was originally composed using the computer program Reason, hence the tidy playing. When Mattis added the reggaeish guitar and Jørgen sang from the heart of his bottom, the song took a quantum leap. (BTW, can you spot the Pink Floyd reference that’s painstakingly hidden somewhere in this track?)

Rolling through the supermarket. Super discount, special bargains. Rolling trolleys, popping lollies. Pawn you soul, we’re going shopping.

Trade your pawn, the game is on. Stuck inside the cheese too long. Bunny ist ein wunderbaumer. Hopes to find a love supplier.

You’re at the store, you never asked for more, you’ve got to take the chance, we’re gonna close your door.

All in all you’re just another hick in the mall.

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Corny Crack Jimmy

The dramatic story of

      Corny Crack Jimmy
who is sent off to war, after an epic party.

Continue reading “Corny Crack Jimmy”

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The Soul in the Woodshed

The story behind

      The Soul in the Woodshed
is illustrative of the Ping approach to composing. Drum tracks were recorded initially, whereupon each band member got to write down his two favorite chords, enough to make verse and chorus.

Continue reading “The Soul in the Woodshed”

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Musikk til barne-tv mon tro?

      Bow to the Beagle
fra The Castle Massacre har alltid slått godt an blant små mennesker.

      God Mad
(fortrinnsvis siste del)

og

      Mr. Kazoo
er uutgitt grums med lystige undertoner :]
      Mr. Kazoo